If one mother wears long the other mother needs to wear long also. Do the mothers' dresses need to match the bridesmaids' dresses?

No. This is a common misconception. Mothers are not in the bridesmaids category. They are in the hostess and most honored guest category. In a Christian wedding mothers are seated on a front pew in the church. Seldom are parents included in the picture with the attendants. They are pictured with the bride and groom and family pictures. Their dresses should not clash with the bridesmaids' dresses I(e.g. red and orange).In a Jewish wedding the mothers are near the rabbi and the attendants during the entire ceremony. Therefore, in this ceremony more attention has to be paid to the color of the bridesmaids' dresses. However, in both instances, it is imperative that the mothers choose a color that is fabulous on each of them, a color that does not clash with the bridesmaids' dresses.

Do the mothers' dresses need to match in style?

No. One mother may be an accountant and the other an artist. They don't lose their personality for this special occasion. They are not senior bridesmaids of each other. Each mother chooses something she feels emotionally comfortable in and something that portrays her individual sense of style. Remember, mothers will be surrounded be a sea of color called "guests". These people went to their closets and picked out what they felt wonderful in that day. For goodness sake! Mothers should do the same!

In choosing a mother's dress what is the single most important thing?

In my book I state that the three most important factors are color, color and, yes, you guessed it...COLOR! If your dress is not in one of your best colors, people will admire your dress...not you. The eye of the beholder goes to the color and forgives figure imperfections. Choosing your best color is even more important if you don't have a great figure. I have seen average looking women transformed into incredible looking women by putting them in their best, or one of their best, colors.

Doesn't my mother's dress need to match the color of the bridesmaids?

No! Your mother's dress does not have to match, it shouldn't "clash". Remember that traditionally, the mother of the bride is the hostess of the wedding and the mother of the groom is the most honored guest. Your guests have gone to their closets the day of the wedding and chosen what they feel they look best in.

Shouldn't the mothers do the same?

In my opinion a "clash" is red and orange, not blue and green. In a Jewish ceremony the mothers will be standing near the attendants throughout the ceremony. Therefore, the color of their dresses should be complimentary of the bridesmaids dresses...but still in their own individual best color. In a Christian ceremony mothers are seated at the front of the church in front of the "sea" of guests. Bridesmaids are up near the alter. Why does the mother of the bride, traditionally, choose the formality of the dresses the mothers will wear? If she is indeed acting in the traditional role of the mother of the bride, she is the hostess of the wedding. If she chooses to wear a long dress, the mother of the groom should do likewise. Once the groom and groomsmen are in tuxes, you are at a formal wedding in my opinion.

In choosing a mother's dress what is the single most important thing?

In my book I state that the three most important factors are color, color and, yes, you guessed it...COLOR! If your dress is not in one of your best colors, people will admire your dress...not you. The eye of the beholder goes to the color and forgives figure imperfections. Choosing your best color is even more important if you don't have a great figure. I have seen average looking women transformed into incredible looking women by putting them in their best, or one of their best, colors.
– Barbara Coolidge Tibbetts, T. Carolyn Fashions

How can I manage my budget for my wedding?

The first thing you need to do is to monitor your guest list, and invite people that are going to support you in your marriage. You then need to choose your menu choices wisely by making selections according to the time of day of your reception. Keep in mind that a buffet is often your most cost effective catering service choice. Try not to over embellish. Keep things simple; simple is elegant.

How do I determine the Number of servings of cake to have for my guests, when our menu is a heavy meal with lots of alcohol, as opposed to a lighter hors d'oeuvre menu with less alcohol?

The rule for the bride's cake is one serving per guest in attendance and half as many for the groom's cake. If there are to be heavy alcoholic beverages, you may want to reduce the bride's cake about 25 servings. If the meal is heavy you might consider a lighter, less rich flavored cake like lemon or white.
– Susan Clark, Sweet Memories Cakes and Catering

With the economic changes in today's world, how I can economize on my wedding cake costs?

We suggest you consider having a smaller wedding cake and add cupcakes displayed at different levels around the cake. Or, you can have a cupcake tree instead of a wedding cake and place the anniversary cake on top.
– Susan Clark Sweet Memories Cakes & Catering

Why should a bride consider purchasing an off the rack bridal gown?

The biggest reason is peace of mind! Special order gowns usually take from four to six months for delivery. Since most bridal gowns are manufactured outside of the US, the gowns are shipped by boat and then cleared through Customs. Distributors must inspect the gowns and ship them to the bridal shops. Obviously with so many steps, many delays can and do happen!

Bridal shops won’t know until the gown arrives in their shop if it is the correct size, color, and style or if the gown made it through the shipping process in mint condition. If the gown’s not perfect, bridal shops must go through hoops to get another gown sent and often, paying a rush fee is not enough to get a gown to a bride in time for her wedding day.

Having possession of your gown is ideal for many reasons. When you buy off the rack, you can take your gown with you when you select jewelry and shoes. You can set alterations and bridal portrait appointments. There will be no last minute surprises.

Why should I use live music?
Live music has a depth and resonance that fills a room and creates a warm mood, unlike the electronic sound of a CD. Experienced musicians can adapt quickly and easily to last minute changes and can make their music fit and flow with the ceremony.

Do you have advice on live music selections?
You should select music that makes you happy! Couples generally feel more comfortable staying with the familiar wedding selections, but a large range of music appropriate for weddings is available to choose from and requests for music special to the couple can usually be accommodated by live musicians.

What arrangements should I make for string quartets?
Musicians in a string quartet are accustomed to playing in many different conditions. The basic requirements are: four straight-backed armless chairs, light or a convenient electrical outlet for our stand lights, and shade if it is an outdoor wedding. These needs apply to both ceremonies and receptions. Most musicians travel with all their own equipment and do not need a sound system or microphones.

Should I expect our musicians to be at the wedding rehearsal?

No. Professional musicians will work from a Wedding Ceremony Worksheet that you will complete prior to your wedding. It provides a very clear guideline for pieces to be performed before, during, and after the ceremony. However, if you feel strongly about your musicians being at the rehearsal then this can be arranged for an additional fee.

How do I choose music for my wedding?

Professional musicians should have an extensive repertoire list on their website, with many audio examples. They will be happy to make suggestions and provide guidance when choosing music for your wedding ceremony.

Should I expect my musicians to play pieces that are not listed on their website?

Most musicians can accommodate special requests for music, with a few guidelines:

• Allow extra time (at least 4-6 weeks) so they can locate the music if they don't have it in their library.
• Some requests require that music be specially arranged, which is an additional fee and requires extra time.
• Be sure to check with the officiant at your ceremony about any special musical requests. Some places of worship have special guidelines regarding what kind of music can be performed at wedding ceremonies.

Why should couples use live musicians for their ceremony, instead of recorded music?

Using live music creates a special ambiance that can't be reproduced with recorded music. Musicians can time each piece of music selected to fit perfectly with each part of the ceremony, creating a smooth, seamless flow.

What advice do you give couples regarding music selections?

Many couples have definite ideas about which pieces they want performed at their wedding. For those who aren't sure, we recommend listening the wedding "classics" first. Most musicians have a large repertoire, with many audio examples available, and can also perform special requests, provided the pieces are arranged for string quartet.

Do string quartets require any special accommodations at the ceremony and/or reception site?

String quartets are extremely portable and can adapt to nearly any performing situation. If the venue is outdoors, musicians need to be out of direct sunlight. Since the weather can be unpredictable, couples planning for an outdoor wedding need to have a contingency plan for an indoor location in case the weather doesn't cooperate.

What if you love the presentation of a certain cake design (5 to 6 tiers), but you really don't need that many servings of cake?

Adding decorated faux Styrofoam tiers for additional height and elegance is always an option. The guests will never know it is not real!
– Ruthie Stivers, Delicious Cakes!

Why do I need to hire a professional photographer for my wedding when friends can take pictures with their cameras or the disposable cameras I plan on putting out on the tables?

There are several excellent reasons why you want a true professional photographer at your wedding. To start, only a trained professional will understand all of the aspects of a wedding and capture the beauty and emotion of the day. Typically, a professional photographer will have much better equipment and photography training, plus access to superior labs and albums.

A full-time, full-service professional photographer will also have the expertise to create a stunning storybook of images for you, instead of a scrapbook full of snapshots.

When it’s all said and done, your photographs will be the principal means for you to relive the beauty, emotion, and excitement of your wedding day. Do you really want to trust your memories to anyone other than a professional photographer?
– Dwayne Lee, Southern Flair Photography

Why should I choose a seasonal menu?

Many culinary teams and caterers now suggest seasonal menu items. This option allows a bride to include local and/or seasonal vegetables, meats, and seafood into her presentation and may reduce the cost per person.

For example, a tasty starter course of butternut squash soup mirrors fall colors. An upside-down apple crisp is warm comfort food in winter. The bright green crispness of asparagus signals the advent of spring, and fresh berries and fruits are refreshing and light for summer.

You may be surprised how seasonal selections can tie into centerpieces, textures of linens, and lighting. Think of some of your favorite seasonal foods and consult the venue manager or chef about how to incorporate them into the menu for your special day. Don’t forget to ask about an edible flower of the season, or an herb to use as a garnish, as well!

Are There Any Emotions Not Evoked in the Wedding Process?

Brides, be prepared to feel:

• Overwhelmed during the process of selecting the date, the church, and reception venue;
• Fatigued as you try on the 20th dress and it’s still not “the one”;
• Indecision as to whether green, pink, or black is the best color for bridesmaids’ dresses;
• Guilty when you just can’t fit every childhood friend or relative into your wedding party;
• Stressed as the big date draws near and there is still so much to be done;
• Sadness that those who mentored you may not be there to share your wedding day.

It’s okay. Live each moment graciously, letting all emotions flow over and through you, leaving room for gratitude that your maid of honor is very organized and helped keep you on task, admiration that your mother-in-law to be has raised such a wonderful son, and elation that your mother is so much smarter than you ever believed. Your perfect day will arrive on wings of happiness and thanksgiving, filled with the warmth of your groom’s arms, the joy of oneness, and love without boundaries.
– Brenda Johnson Certified Wedding Consultant Hilton Dallas Lincoln Centre

How Do I Select My Wedding Reception Location?

Selecting a venue for a bride’s big day is often based on location, budget and aesthetics. However, selecting a person to oversee and coordinate the festivities is far more important. A bride needs a person who has developed a passion for making dreams come true.

Passion is exhibited in welcoming and calming presence at the most pressure filled moments and a willingness to mediate, console and mesh ideals from both families, the bride and the mother of the bride.

Passion is a belief that all things are possible through imagination and creativity while being practical about budgetary constraints.

A passionate manager, planner or consultant is in constant pursuit of perfection in executing each detail no matter how laborious or tedious the task.

Passion is proactive and will have foresight based on experience to provide a solution before the bride knows there is a need.

Passion-filled professionals are enriched as the result of each relationship built, each last-minute addition, each beautiful dress, each precisely pressed tuxedo, the fragrance of a bouquet, each first dance and the “thank you” twinkle in a bride’s eyes. Find this characteristic and you will have found a truly committed planner, consultant or catering manager who will make your dream day a reality.
– Brenda Johnson, Certified Wedding Consultant Hilton Dallas Lincoln Centre

Why do I keep hearing, "What is your vision for your wedding?"

Brides are not always aware of the importance of sharing their vision. However, a bride becomes as skilled as Picasso or Van Gogh as she unveils and paints through details a vivid picture full of colors, textures, times, tastes and feels that a manager can utilize to create a fantasy event. Wedding professionals are known for their perception, composition, balance, creativity and resourcefulness. Paint the broad stokes that will outline your day. Now, let us complete the canvas by creating a masterpiece event with memories to be cherished forever.
– Brenda Johnson, Certified Wedding Consultant Hilton Dallas Lincoln Centre

WHEN IS THE BEST TIME TO HOLD A GARDEN WEDDING?

Garden weddings can be beautiful any time of the year, as long as your main consideration is weather and comfort. Be sure that there are accommodations should Texas weather not cooperate. Look for gardens with sophistication and style that include an isolated, quiet, private venue. Ponds, waterfalls, paths, gazebos, flowers and trees add sparkle and variety to any garden. Because garden weddings are so popular, be sure to find your location early, as prime dates book quickly. Ask for photos of prior garden weddings to visualize your event. And enjoy your beautiful outside wedding.
– Michael & Penny Story - Reflections on Spring Creek

Can you give us a timeline for last-minute details?

In Texas you may get your marriage license from the County Clerk. Call the clerk’s office for hours and cash amounts needed. You both need to appear before the clerk, bringing proof of identity and age (a passport, driver’s license, birth certificate, etc). Also bring your social security numbers. You may get your license within a 30-day period before your wedding, but you must have it at least 72 hours before your ceremony. Last-minute (a couple of weeks prior) decisions include: final guest list for your event; checking final travel clothes, essentials, and documents; checking all items needed for your ceremony and reception; verifying hair and makeup appointments for wedding party; and asking for help. Your friends and family will be delighted to take much of the last-minute burden off you and your groom. Let them!
– Michael & Penny Story - Reflections on Spring Creek

I know what the bride needs to do, what are some things the groom needs to do?

Often the groom thinks that buying the ring, paying for the license, finding a best man, and planning the honeymoon  are his only duties. Actually he needs to do several other things, including chose wedding clothes for the groomsmen and fathers; pay for the bride’s bouquet, boutonnieres, and mothers corsages,  choose gifts for his groomsmen, and choose a special gift for the bride. Also don’t forget to pay the clergyman a few days before the wedding or give the fee to the best man to pay the minister before the ceremony.  These are just a few of the groom’s duties.  Any good wedding planning manual can give you a complete list.
– Michael & Penny Story - Reflections on Spring Creek

After reading your article about wearing gloves, and learning to leave the glove off until after the ceremony, I have a question. For aesthetic purposes, is it better to go ahead and remove BOTH gloves, or just remove the glove on the left hand? Won’t it look silly with just one glove on? What is the proper etiquette for this?

It is recommended to take both gloves off and then give them to your MOH. There is no reason to put them back on until time for photos. Don’t make a big display of taking them off. It should be quick and easy.